I know you have seen this picture before but please keep reading. The text is different. In previous posts, I have urged you to make appointments for mammograms.
You may be afraid of having a mammogram. . . even if you've had one before. . . there is fear. There is no need to worry. By taking a few minutes each day for a week, preceeding the exam and doing the following practice exercises, you will be totally prepared for the test, and best of all, you can do these simple exercises right at home.
EXERCISE 1: Open your refrigerator door, and insert one breast between the door and the inside of the refrigerator. Have one of your strongest friends slam the door shut as hard as possible and lean on the door with lots of pressure for good measure. Hold that position for five seconds. Repeat in case the first time wasn't effective. Insert the other breast and repeat these instructions.
EXERCISE 2: Visit your garage at 3:00 a.m. when the temperature of the cement floor is just perfect. Take off all your clothes and lie comfortably on the floor sideways with one breast wedged comfortably under the rear tire of the car. Ask a friend to slowly back the car up until your breast is sufficiently flattened and chilled. Switch sides, and repeat for the other breast.
EXERCISE 3: Freeze two metal bookends overnight. Strip to the waist. Invite a stranger into the room. Have the stranger press the bookends against either side of one of your breasts and smash the bookends together as hard as she can. Repeat for the other breast. Set an appointment with the stranger to meet next year to do it again.
They are now properly prepared !
Seriously, if it's time for a mammogram, run, don't walk, to your phone to schedule an appointment. It may be the most important phone call you have ever made. I am living proof.
Here are links to previous Breast Cancer Awareness Posts:
What Cancer Cannot Do (Poem)
October: Breast Cancer Awareness Month (Be Informed)
The Day My World Changed (Black Darkness)
Light at the End of My Tunnel (Life Goes On)
Inflammatory Breast Cancer (Video)
Bald is Beautiful (Swampwitch Revealed)
There are many links included in the above posts. If one person's life is saved because of the information read here, this has been worth every single minute of time dedicated to working on this blog (glob). Kathy :)
P.S. Men can be victims of breast cancer, too. Our daughter-in-law's father is a breast cancer survivor. It is important for everyone to do self-exams. If you notice a "bump," "lump," or any change in your breast, please see your doctor.